Tuesday, June 19, 2007
/12:12 pm
It must have been that six days of continuous classes, or maybe the recent foray in to facebook. But I've been thinking, or you might call it brooding about the past. The thing about signing up with facebook is that you get to know what people have been doing in their lives. People whom you haven't met in months, years even. And the 6 days brought me back to the days in jc - perhaps it was the certainty of having a classroom, of seeing the same people the entire day. There was not discontinuity, or the 2 hour friends you make just for the lecture each week, and after a while, there's a class dynamaic that's comforting and familiar.
Those were the times when I felt the world was waiting for me, that I could do something for my future, that there were options. And there was ambition and drive. These days, I know my future looks something like : degree, job, marriage, kids etc. And there's no... desire to do something more, except to move on this trajectory. It's as though doing anything more can't change this.
And how people have changed after a few years abroad. A recent meetup with one friend found conversation somewhat difficult. The past few years have seen us entrenched in different experiences, and so we speak of the weather, the mundane everyday topics, or travel back into the past. And my peers, when they return next year, recently graduated and ready to work in whichever organisation they've been bonded to, I wonder, would we still talk? For a while, we looked set to move on together, to oxford and scholarships and overseas and everything else, and then that changed and it was as though everything changed with that.
I'm not making much sense am I? I still feel slightly jumbled up inside. I can't quite sort out my thoughts about this matter, so I pick the easiest option - avoidance.
Labels: Life
0 had their say | have yours?
Tuesday, June 19, 2007
/12:12 pm
It must have been that six days of continuous classes, or maybe the recent foray in to facebook. But I've been thinking, or you might call it brooding about the past. The thing about signing up with facebook is that you get to know what people have been doing in their lives. People whom you haven't met in months, years even. And the 6 days brought me back to the days in jc - perhaps it was the certainty of having a classroom, of seeing the same people the entire day. There was not discontinuity, or the 2 hour friends you make just for the lecture each week, and after a while, there's a class dynamaic that's comforting and familiar.
Those were the times when I felt the world was waiting for me, that I could do something for my future, that there were options. And there was ambition and drive. These days, I know my future looks something like : degree, job, marriage, kids etc. And there's no... desire to do something more, except to move on this trajectory. It's as though doing anything more can't change this.
And how people have changed after a few years abroad. A recent meetup with one friend found conversation somewhat difficult. The past few years have seen us entrenched in different experiences, and so we speak of the weather, the mundane everyday topics, or travel back into the past. And my peers, when they return next year, recently graduated and ready to work in whichever organisation they've been bonded to, I wonder, would we still talk? For a while, we looked set to move on together, to oxford and scholarships and overseas and everything else, and then that changed and it was as though everything changed with that.
I'm not making much sense am I? I still feel slightly jumbled up inside. I can't quite sort out my thoughts about this matter, so I pick the easiest option - avoidance.
Labels: Life
0 had their say | have yours?
