Saturday, July 26, 2003
/9:27 pmCouldn't get ocp yesterday. Or rather when I wanted to sign it, there was no one to sign it, and after that I couldn't be bothered anymore because if I went home I had to think of how to get to mt alvernia and my brain couldn't take it.
You see. I don't exactly like the school sick bay as much as some other people do. For one it's air-conditioned, and there're no blankets (I think, should be, I can't quite remember), and hence it's cold. Besides, it gives me the feeling that it's filled with germs and going to make me even more sick. I'd very much sleep in the classroom or lie down in the lt 5 benches. Better yet, I think so long as the sick bay is non-airconditioned i'll be perfectly fine with it, as it was in the old rgps. I really miss that building, just as I miss the the old ny building, which surprisingly, I had never gone into the sick bay at all.
I'm feeling better today, well enough to go down for college day. Channel U is showing some programme about this girl who is suffering from some severe sort of insecurities (stopped watching, so I can't exactly say what it is). What shocked me was how my behaviour was so much like hers at times, but I think I'm better, because I can block things out and brush them away and forget most of them.
Am listening to the syf pieces on mp3 now. It sounds wonderful, especially dong. I didn't feel that much on stage, other than knowing that the music was good, but it didn't touch me on stage. It touches me now, as I listen to it. I wholly agree with what samuel said. I think we put in the effort, and so much, and we really wanted it, and unlikely as it seemed during the rehearsal, we made it. It only happens when you desire it so much and give everything you can give to it, because you know not only do you want it, but the seniors, and everyone around you who has patiently put up with you while you practice day after day in school. You can't let them down. That's how it seems for me. Despite fei tian going a bit out of sync, the rest sounded brilliant. My hope, is to play dong in it's entirety in the next concert.